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(Once again I dig deep into the archives to answer questions about the medical school admissions process-PB)
Dear Panda,
In order to take advantage of affirmative action, I lied about my race. Good move or not?
Sincerely,
Plain Vanilla Pre-med
(Eating a Baloney Sandwich, on White Bread, With Mayonaise, somewhere in Minnesota)
Dear Vanilla,
I also lied about my race. […]

(I have received quite a few emails over the past two years asking for advice as well as anwering a lot of questions about the medical school admission process on The Student Doctor Network. I thought I’d publish some of them along with my replies. -PB)
Dear Panda,
I said I spoke Spanish on my AMCAS application […]

(Many of you are about to start third year and are looking forward to it with feelings of both anticipation and dread. You know that it’s going to be the real start of your medical career where you finally get to see what all the fuss is about. At the same time, despite the propaganda, […]

Actual Evaluation by My Residents and Attendings
(Just for old time’s sake I reviewed my Dean’s letter. Man, those were the days! -PB)
OB/Gyn: Student is on time and does everything asked of him willingly and with good humor but seemed uninterested in assisting in any more vaginal deliveries than were required to pass the rotation. […]

Psychiatric Ward
Inpatient psychiatry wasn’t as fun as I thought it would be. The people locked up on the tenth floor of our hospital were just a little too crazy to really be interesting. A little insanity, like a little spice, adds flavor to a patient’s personality. Too much of it and it […]

Problem Based Learning
Lecture is a pleasant, drowsy picnic where you nod in and out of sleep while listening to the far-away drone of bees and the faint ringing of goat-bells as the local peasant girls herd them to the high alpine pastures.
Problem Based Learning is like being sodomized in prison by a big sweaty guy […]

It Sucks to be You
My post on my first day of third year seems to have struck a nerve and a few of you have asked some variation of the question, “What can we do to end the abuses which are so much a part of medical training?”
The short answer is, “nothing.”
As long as there […]

It’s Going to Get Worse Before It Gets Better
Many of you have just started medical school and I want to congratulate you and remind you that no matter how bleak it looks during the first few months of first year, the time will pass and one day you will look back and wonder where the […]

What to Expect Now that You’re Accepted
One of the greatest days of my life was when I was accepted to medical school. It ranks up there with my marriage to my lovely wife, the birth of our children, the day I graduated Marine Corps boot camp and the day I was honorably discharged.
I’m not ashamed […]

The Two Week Rule
Eventually you will fill all of the pockets of your white coat with various pocket reference books, tools, and pens the wieght of which will suprise you. These things will accumulate on you like barnacles on a whale and you will be reluctant to scrape them off against the possibility that you […]

Save Your Money

As you can imagine, medical school is a fairly expensive undertaking. It will also consume huge quantities of your time. With this in mind I’d like to go over a few things that you do and do not need either because they are expensive or because they will complicate your life rather than […]

Is This Person a Tool?
1. Asks questions during lecture, especially near the end when everybody else just wants to get a break.
Folks, lectures are mostly a passive affair more often than not delivered straight from the Power-point slides. This is why most lectures are sparesly attended. In the old days we relied on a note-taking […]

All Dressed Up, Nowhere to Go

Are you essential to the running of the OR? Will your skills be of any value?
Of course not.
On the other hand, just because you don’t know your ass from a hole in the ground when it comes to surgery does not mean that the team does not want you there. […]

Yes, the Scrub Nurse is Laughing at You

The dreaded day has arrived. You are on your first surgery rotation. After a brief orientation you are told to report to the operating room to “scrub in” for your first surgey.
Get ready to run the gauntlet. You have the potential, in the next few hours, to screw […]

You Are Worthless and Weak

What is rounding?
At it’s most basic, rounding is the process of visiting hospitalized patients as part of a team. The team usually consists of an Attending Physician, a collection of upper level and junior residents and medical students.
The Attending Physician, or the “Attending” is the boss. He is usually a senior […]

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